Answered: Can You Get PTSD From an Affair?
Infidelity is one of the most painful experiences that anybody can go through in a relationship. Few people will be able to deal with the sudden breakdown of trust in a positive manner. While some can overcome this pain over time, others can find it more difficult. For some who have been betrayed by their partners, infidelity can lead to long-lasting trauma and they may experience symptoms similar to those who have been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
Signs that You May Be Experiencing PTSD From Infidelity
Being the victim of an affair can cause a lot of pain and you may experience a wide range of feelings or emotions. The feeling of betrayal can also result in the resurfacing of unresolved issues from your past. However, there are certain symptoms that best show that you are experiencing infidelity-based PTSD:
1. Self-Blame:
People suffering from PTSD produced by infidelity may often blame themselves for their partner’s actions. For example, you may be questioning whether your partner would have cheated if you had been nicer or had more sexual intercourse with them. In other cases, individuals may blame themselves for not being able to notice the signs of their partner straying away from the relationship.
2. Feelings of Disorientation and Poor Emotional Regulation:
In some cases of PTSD, people may feel that their emotions are out of their control, this results in experiencing a wide range of feelings in a short space of time. You may find that you are happy in one moment and then feel an immense wave of sadness in the next. The overwhelming power of this rapid change in emotion can often lead to people with PTSD feeling disoriented or “zoning out”.
3. Intrusive Thoughts:
Trauma weighs heavily on the mind, and the brain can try to process it several times. However, this often reinforces the act of betrayal and can result in you thinking about the infidelity many times a day while also questioning the different ways you could have prevented it. Naturally, having such thoughts will make it more difficult to heal.
There are several other symptoms of PTSD that you may be experiencing after an affair, such as:
1. Out of body experiences
2. An overwhelming feeling of powerlessness
3. Searching for more information about the betrayal
Healing Your Trauma
If you are experiencing any of the listed symptoms, then visiting a professional who has experience in dealing with affair-induced PTSD can help. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a psychotherapy treatment that is particularly effective at alleviating the distress associated with traumatic memories. Meanwhile, you should note down your symptoms, as being aware of them is the first step you can take in managing them. If you have chosen to forgive your partner, then they will also have a role to play in your healing. You must think of them as an ally in your healing process, and they must recognize their faults and feel remorseful about their infidelity.
As the act of betrayal can also lead to the re-emergence of past trauma, you and your partner would have to deal with both the re-emerging trauma responses and the current symptoms you face.
Moving on from infidelity as a couple is a difficult act, but one of the most crucial steps in building a future relationship is to recognize that your earlier relationship has ended but it is still possible to build a new one that can withstand future challenges. However, this is not an easy task, and it will take an immense amount of effort from you and your partner, but if done correctly, the result will be a stronger relationship than the one you had previously.
Begin Trauma Counseling in Wake Forest, NC
You don’t have to struggle in your marriage. You can heal from the trauma of infidelity and rebuild your relationship with your partner and trust each other again. Our marriage and family counselors can help you along this journey. Our Wake Forest, NC-based therapy practice would be honored to support you. To begin, follow these simple steps:
Meet with a caring therapist
Heal the broken bonds in your relationship and cultivate your marriage
Other Services Offered at My-Therapist
Marriage and Family Counseling is not the only service we offer from our Wake Forest, NC-based therapy practice. Other mental health services include online therapy, couples intensive therapy, AAMFT & LMHC approved supervision, foundations of lasting love, couples workshops and retreats, Gottman method couples therapy, emotionally focused couples therapy, and individual therapy.
References
Bockmann, M. (2019, July 10). 5 Things You Must Know About Surviving Infidelity PTSD. Retrieved from Thrive Global: https://thriveglobal.com/stories/5-things-you-must-know-about-surviving-infidelity-ptsd/#:~:text=PTSD%20is%20possible%3F-,Many%20people%20are%20surprised%20that%20infidelity,PTSD%20but%20it%20is%20true.&text=Furthermore%2C%20the%20trauma%20that%20results,
Gunther, R. (2017, September 29). How Infidelity Causes Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Retrieved from Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/rediscovering-love/201709/how-infidelity-causes-post-traumatic-stress-disorder